HOW DEEP IS THE LOVE . .

Do you know how God pursues those who run from Him? He pursues them with purpose, and with provision, and with unbending love. The tiny book of Hosea is a mini-pageant of God's pursuing love played on the stage of human life. In it, Gomer leaves her good husband Hosea and goes her own way, taking other lovers and shaming the faithful man she married. But he doesn't write her off or cut her loose. In fact, even when she is with other men, he is concerned for her welfare, and reckoning for her good. When Gomer sets up housekeeping with another man, Hosea seeks him out and gives him wool and flax and bread, saying, "Give her these, she'll need them." So the man does, and takes credit for them himself, receiving the gratitude and affection that should have been Hosea's. God's love is like that, isn't it? He keeps on loving you and keeps on loving me, even when we say "God, I've had enough," and run from Him! We flee as far and as fast as we can, then stop to catch our breath and think we've out-distanced Him. But then there's a quiet word or a gentle touch, and God is near again. We say, "Lord, how did you find me here?" and He replies, "My child, I knew a short-cut." Pursuing love is not deterred by our weak protests. Love always knows a short cut.

Lessons From An Excited Olympic Volunteer.

In my own humble way I have always loved to give back to society my skills and time; so when I had the opportunity of playing an active role in volunteering, i gave it my all. The first task after my volunteering orientation was to be part of a dedicated team who have been assigned the role of recruiting London Ambassadors in Enfield for the Olympic. Ah! the excitement was next to none.

When the program ended, I had this urge that there was more volunteering roles out there to do. Without wasting time I signed up to be a cast at the Olympic [opening and closing] ceremonies. As soon as i passed the auditions, I said to myself - 'The best moments in my life has been the ones without monetary attachments'.
Honestly, the rehearsals were tasking, coupled with the weather, distance to and from practice ground, work and family commitments - all these put together was enough to discourage me from continuing. But each time I turned up, I saw people who were far older than I was in age still giving their very best. people were coming to London from all over the UK [Manchester, Reading, Newcastle, etc]; heard someone came from Belgium. That was the turning point. What did these guys feel that I wasn't feeling, yet they remained committed.
Volunteers do not necessarily have the time; they just have the heart.

The routine involved drumming and marshaling, Every move had a sequence, rhythm and style which over 1,000 volunteers had to perform. Timing was very important, focus was intense; but the volunteer love was burning deep in the heart.
When trying to quantify the amount of time, money and energy put into the Olympics, I feel very proud that I did all of that to achieve success for London and entertainment for the over one billion people all over the world that tuned in to watch the opening ceremony. The friends I gained, the skills i built, the exposure to new things and of course the fact that my family and friends watched me on live TV.
As I write this piece, the rehearsals for the closing ceremonies has begun and I will be braving the traffic and weather to be at my very best. Volunteering is fun, its not a choice, its a responsibility.

These words from Harriet Naylor sums up my piece - "Volunteering can be an exciting, growing, enjoyable experience. It is truly gratifying to serve a cause, practice one's ideals, work with people, solve problems, see benefits, and know one had a hand in them".

The Business of Marriage means Understanding.

I read this wonderful piece on a friends FaceBook wall and decided to share same via the blog. It says everything that I would really want to say, the only difference was that this chap experienced it first hand.
Below is an excerpt of the story/letter -

My name is Dayo. I’m a typical Nigerian guy and I cherish my Fridays a lot; I get to hang out with the sickest guys every Friday night and secondly, It’s another escape from my nagging and boring wife. I get confused sometimes on whether she’s my mother or my wife. Don’t get it twisted; I love her pieces. It just gets complicated; like I wish we never got married…marriage has t

urned her into something that doesn’t amuse me. I wish she was still the adventurous, charming, high spirited lady I dated for five years.

A lot of people say its unethical for married guys to be found in a club, but I wish everyone won’t be too quick to judge and understand that people look for fun to run away from their problems; they just want to breathe, like me.

I forgot to say that I work in Guarantee Trust Bank along Lekki, I love my job and my job loves me, maybe its because I’m the senior banking officer. Lol. This particular morning, a lady breezed into my office. My heart raced faster because I had not sighted anything this beautiful in a long while. She wasn’t the typical slender Barbie, in fact, she was a bit chubby but her smile, cuteness and…I was tripped.

“Hi Good morning! Your ATM has swallowed my card!” She laughed, unlike a typical customer that would ram you.

I just tried to form Boss laughter…

“Good morning, You know what? I’d personally make sure they get it out for you, but not today. Can you wait till Monday?” I smiled

“GTB shaaa! OK, can I just drop my number so you could call me up or just text when its ready so I don’t come twice? Please? My name is Nancy” She blinked her eyes in a funny way.

“Sure” I smiled

We exchanged numbers. What a lucky Friday!

So it was 10:00pm and I headed to the club…as usual my friends were chilling for me. My wife had called a couple of times, I just ignored it. She knows I’m never home Friday nights.

“Look at you!” I heard someone say. I raised my head and it was the ATM lady-Nancy.

“Wow, look at you too!” I was surprised to see her but I was happy I didn’t have to wait till Monday to see her again.

“Happy Friday!” She screamed because of the noise, “Wanna dance?”

I didn’t even have the chance to answer, she already pulled me to dance floor. I really suck at dancing but she helped me; she was a great dancer! I had fun! At some point we decided to go to a private area and we talked, ranging from work, business to personal life. I tried to hide my ring as much as possible, I certainly didn’t want this to end now.

“You are a really wonderful lady. You are so interesting…any guy would want to be with you all day” I said.

“I wasn’t always like this but I have learned the hard way that life is just too short to be sad” she sang

Then her phone rang…

“Hey baby! Yeah I’m at the private lounge, I’d like you to meet someone…alright boo” she talked excitedly as usual.

I was in shock until this tall handsome man walks up to her and kisses her.

“You were late. Meet Dayo; I met him this morning, he’s helping with your ATM I told you got swallowed and Dayo this is my B to the O-O,” she laughed “Meet my husband Kolade, we only come here to dance every fortnight Friday; away from work, stress and kids.”

“Wow, a pleasure” I managed to shake him

Then she stood now excitedly holding her husband’s arms.

“Why don’t we invite Dayo for Mimi’s 16th birthday tomorrow?” Her husband said

They have kids too? How long have they been married and they look like a couple just dating!

“Silly me, please come for my second daughter’s 16th tomorrow. It would be an honor” She brought out an I.V from her purse.

I began to feel so ashamed of myself…this was another guy like me, getting it right with one woman.

I collected the I.V and promised to be there.

“See you tomorrow! Have you had something to eat Kolade?” she talked and dragged her husband along.

They left and I kept staring at the thin air like I had seen a ghost. They come just to dance together every fortnight Fridays? Why didn’t I think of that! Temi loves to dance…she also likes long walks, she loves to talk…she loves jazz music, there’s this vivid picture I have of me putting her hand on my chest when we danced at a jazz club on our first year anniversary…I found myself typing all the things I knew Temi loved to do on my Ipad and I realized I had denied her of all…I had made her the old woman she acts.

What the hell was I doing here! I didn’t even tell my friends goodbye, I walked out of the club into my Jaguar. Temi’s call came through and I picked at first ring.

“Temi?” My heart raced

“I know you are not coming home…”

“I am, stay up so we can gist. Been a while” I decided to do everything on that list and to even add many more for the rest of my lifetime with her.

“Are you alright?” She was shocked I suppose

“And I’d like us to go for a birthday party tomorrow. I want you to meet this amazing couple”

“You sound different Dayo”

“Maybe I’m different”

“Don’t say it! don’t say it! when you come we will gist very well” she laughed

She laughed!!! In just that laughter that I hadn’t heard in a while, she sounded like the lady I married six years ago…

Dear reader,

I wrote this natural piece just to remind us that creating memorable moments with our partner matters. Do you know that little things are the sweetest things? Just creating time to gist and laugh with your partner, having a day in the week that’s exclusively for you both-No friends or kids allowed.

Lady, when last have you told your partner he is so darn hot? Guy! When last have you told your lady she is the sweetest thing? When last have you whispered ‘Thank you’? When last have you been quick to say ‘I’m sorry’?

Do you even have a clue on what your partner loves to do?

When you ignore little things, they are the little pieces of rocks that build up to become a mountain you can’t easily break down.

Pay attention to little things, believe that they work and experience new bliss!

Yours Truly

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“It is not a lack of love, but a lack of friendship that makes unhappy marriages.” 
― Friedrich Nietzsche

If two people know exactly what they like, they fashion out the best way to live together under a common understanding. Marriage just like any business venture involves so many things both human and material - its putting together all of these in the right resource mix that brings it success.

When things don't work the way they ought to, its best for all concerned to sit down, look for where the issue is [without casting blames/nagging or referring back to the past], and source out the right way to ensure the marriage/business doesn't fail in the future.

If you think marriage is tough - ask those who haven't had the chance to marry or those who did not eschew patience to make theirs work.

When Too Good Becomes An Issue

Life has got its ups and downs, sometimes messy; yet most times we are left confused. There is a saying that states: whoever digs into the world of the past [or grave] should be ready to cope with the stench [odor] that it brings.
You see yourself as the nicest person, but someone out there is all out to ensure that they rub past mistakes in your face, just to rob you of the joy that comes with being nice. You focus on your career to ensure all is well with you and yours; yet one busy-body is lurking around the corner to tarnish your reputation.
The job market also has its undoing. They advertise jobs for people with excellent academic results; one rushes to apply, got invited for an interview; only to be told later via email that someone else with same academic records but with work experience has been offered the job.
The jolly good fellow then puts in application to another company, this time added to the CV work placement experience [industrial attachment] in order to boost the chances of getting the job. When the result of the interview came, it stated that they found the CV quite impressive; but the job was given to someone else who had work experience in the same industry and location. This same scenario continued again and again, till the fellow decided that enough was enough - whatever it will take to start building inherent skills and selling them through freelance roles, would be the ultimate strategy to becoming self employed.
Aha! just when you thought you are succeeding, your very own person steps in to discourage you; refreshing your mind on how good you feel, but never good enough for employers. They do everything [unknowingly sometimes] to make you give up on your pursuit. They say you are lazy and should go learn a trade or do menial jobs. Dream killers!
Yes! people will always talk, but what matters most is doing what gives joy and self fulfillment.
Life can also be terrible in relationships - either marriage, courtship or mere boyfriend/girlfriend romance - the last thing either of the party concerned should do is try digging up past issues. Sincerely this things take away inherent joy and happiness.
So many people are not able to deal with their past mistakes; the best they can do is try to forget that it ever happened and move on to ensuring that the now and future shines a better light. Example, the guy has an issue with controlling his alcohol intake, the lady should while trying to caution him in a party, never remind him of how he fell into the gutter after a drinking spree in the past. Same goes for the guys, if a girl honestly tells you of her past sexual experiences at parties - never ever remind her when you guys have an argument; it will forever ruin the trust she has in you.
We all have our masquerade faces tucked away in the trash, should anyone try to recycle them - they rob you of your current beauty. The annoying part is that its the people that we trust so much; the ones that are deep in our lives; the ones that rejoices with our seemingly good; the ones we owe our successes to - yes! the very people we call our own. They bring back dirty memories and leave you asking yourself why you ever thought you could ever be good again.

Now, if you have found yourself in this situation, this is my humble advise - live everyday of your life as if it was the devil himself challenging you, never stop trusting in God for breakthrough and confidence, stay strong, keep doing good and never ever stop smiling - for that smile shows you are a victor!

A Son, A Father and A Mentor.

Its been over 3years since my father passed away to the great beyond, memories of all the times we spent together - good or bad, daddy was still the boss in my life. I am now a father to 3 wonderful kids who adore me even when i am yet to take them to disneyland; and love the good and naughty times we spend together.

As another Fathers' Day observation is celebrated worldwide, I thought it wise to assess the transition from sonhood to fatherhood and mentorhood. How much do we learn as a son, how much have we shared as a father and how much have been impacted as mentors???

Young and innocent all I wanted was to grow up and do the stuffs that big boys did; there had to be a male figure who commanded lots of influence and was willing to direct me. Daddy was the typical busy business man, who loved travelling and hosting friends and family whenever he was in town. I watched my dad talk, brag and drink with his peers; the more drinks they had, the louder the talks. As the days turned into years, i saw myself doing same hangouts, drink, brag; this time my dad has grown old to become my mentor - one of those days, he shared his experiences about alchohol, diabetes, fake friends, secrets and regrets about putting other things before family - and I learnt - now my son will learn too.

During festive seasons and celebrations, as children my siblings and I looked forward to new clothes, shoes, toys, et al. Mum was there to hand them out, she knew our sizes and favorite colors; though we knew my dad paid for them, we were mostly interested in the one who gave the gifts. One of those happy days, my dad asked, 'if you were to give a huge amount of money to either of your parents, who would you give?', in response I said 'Mummy, cos she would know your taste and ensure you have the very best'. That response stunned the old boy. The experience has taught me to not only pay for the gifts, but also ensure that I showed how much I loved to give it to them - and I learnt - so my son will learn too.

I grew up in a big family, where cousins, aunties, uncles, relations, etc visited and stayed over many times. Dad in his early age was the typical rich African man who took pride in helping people, solving problems and attending to family issues. He expected people to show gratitude to his kind gestures and would brag about his givings 'if it wasnt for me, you wouldnt be where you are today' he would say laughing loud. He was very angry with those who didnt acknowledge his goodwill. One of those beautiful evenings, daddy now old shared his regrets with me - 'never let your left hand know what your right hand has given' when God blesses you with the heart to give, do it and never seek glory. I have learnt to give out of Gods love - and my son will learn too.

Before my dad passed on, we spent ample time together sharing ideas, knowledge and informations. He valued a good name to riches and gold; he was ready to go to any length to defend his integrity. I knew his likes and dislikes, his friends, his whereabouts, his plans for us his children. He left without doing some of the things he really really wanted to do. There was so much he wanted to share, he was too busy chasing success and when he had time, we the children too became busy with our families, business, academics, et al. Its a clear lesson, even in our busy schedules, make time for the kids; tell them all they need to know and you'll save them loads. I have learnt - and my son will learn too.

Despite all the errors of fatherhood my dad made, when he became my mentor i knew that God had blessed me with a good man. My dad left us for a year and went on a personal retreat to study the truth about God. He had read the Bible back-to-back twice, by the time he came back home, we knew the old boy has grown wiser. I am in my third year of reading the Bible back-to-back and have found so much joy - and my son will learn too. Dad didnt just teach me how to pray, he prayed for and with me.

My dad corrected my tenses, showed me how to piece words together, inducted me into drinking coffee, gave me newspapers to read, discussed politics with me. I remember vividly at age 9, he would ask me to watch to the evening news and relay to him the main news. The true value of all these occured to me when he departed - its now my turn to put my son in the right.

I have devoted so much time with my wife and kids, cos i know what it means to be a Son, Father and a Mentor when my son becomes old enough to start his own family. Closing my eyes, I can write my dads biography over and over again - my prayer is for my son to know and achieve more than I did. The mistake we make as parents is that we keep it too long to discover who we are and when we actively get involve in our childrens lives. Fathers teach Sons how to grow, Mentors teach older sons from their experience.

To every man who has been blessed with a child; delay may be dangerous, time is now to teach this kids what they ought to know and do. HAPPY FATHERS DAY.